


We Could be Friends!

by Liliriu



Category: Cthulhu Mythos - H. P. Lovecraft, LOVECRAFT H. P. - Works, The Thing on the Doorstep - H. P. Lovecraft
Genre: Jealousy, M/M, Manipulative Relationship, Unhealthy Relationships, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:40:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26932285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liliriu/pseuds/Liliriu
Summary: Dan and Edward's relationship.Warnings: internalized homophobia, transphobia.
Relationships: daniel upton/edward pickman derby (one sided)
Kudos: 7





	We Could be Friends!

We are sat in my library, me and my best friend Edward, one pleasant afternoon. His enchanting poet’s face is buried in some old, dusty book.

“Give me a massage,” I ask him sweetly.

“I don’t want to,” he says distractedly, still fixated inside his book.

“Come on! What do you have those soft hands for?”

He takes his eyes off the book, and proceeds to examine his hands. “They are not soft,” he declares, but there is some – rather endearing – tremble to his voice, and he is staring at the ground.

I get up from my couch and step towards him. I take his little hands between my own, carefully studying their texture. “Soft!” I sentence with a triumphant smile, and gently kiss the tip of one finger. Then I take a look at my watch. “Anyway, I should really go back to work,” I tell him, and as I turn to leave, “you stay here and rest. Or write a couple of poems, maybe!”

***

He arrives to my house nearly in tears. It seems that he has got in trouble – trouble with some girl – and he is being blackmailed now. “If my father finds out,” he says, “he’ll kill me. Kill me!”

I let him in, as I try to wipe from my mind the dreadful image of the evil harlot tainting his virginal body. I comfort him, pour him some whisky, promise him that everything will be fine. Of course, I will give him the money, everything will be just all right. He seems to relax a bit, but is still crying faintly, “Oh, Dan, how did I get into this mess?!”

I do not lecture him for now, since I know that he is in a sensible state. Poor thing, so innocent and unworldly, so easy to take advantage of. I do tell him not to be angry at his father, who only wants the best for him. I know that much, since I am a father myself. He keeps drinking, drinks a bit too much. My poor baby, he really has no stomach for alcohol. His cheeks are all tinted pretty pink now, those chubby cheeks, just like my child’s, who I called after him because I knew how sad he was about not having children of his own. I hug my friend’s sweet body and he is so close to me now, I can feel his soothing heartbeat against my chest. I could had kissed his lips, had I wanted to, but I do not, as I am not some kind of – of degenerate. And even if I were a degenerate, I could not bear the thought of corrupting such an innocent, pure soul.

But really, it is all because of those dubious types that he is spending too much time with, those so called “bohemians,” they have a bad influence on him. I am not going to lie; I am a bit frustrated, after all the effort I have always invested in protecting him from vice. Yet, I am confident that this is just a phase, that he will eventually come back to me. I am his best friend, after all. Besides, it is not like he ever actually left. He still visits us, me and my wife, at least three or four times a week; we are like family to him, and he is smart enough to know that he can really trust us, and just how lucky he is to have us.

***

“Here, have some more cake,” my wife tells Edward.

Edward complies, he is so fond of sugar, just like a child.

“Don’t overfeed him,” I tell my wife, “he does not exercise enough, and he’s getting paunchy,” I feel the little curve of his belly with my hand, “he’ll soon enough look like a middle-aged man, at this pace,” I conclude.

“Well, he is a middle-aged man,” she says, a trace of impatience in her voice. Sometimes I think that she is jealous of our bond. Silly women!

I laugh and caress his yellow hair, while saying “well, that is certainly easy to forget!”

He gives me an adorable, hurt look. Really, he is the prettiest when he is upset. And he does know that I am just teasing, after all.

***

I am very worried, since I perceive my little Edward to be changed lately. He does not come to visit me as much as he would, and when he does, he seems… absent, in a way. I ask him many times what the matter is, but he does not seem to trust me, as if he had forgotten that I am his best friend.

Finally, I get the truth out of him. It appears that he has met a woman, a fellow university student, a member of his little crowd of “sophisticates,” no less. I clench my fists, and he jumps at my reaction. “I knew I should not have told you!” he yells at me.

I count to ten, calm myself, tell myself that I am going to lose him if I am not careful, and then I really will not be able to help him. Armed with all self-control that I can gather, I tell him that it is all right, and slowly make him pour the information.

The truth is darker than I would had imagined. The girl’s name is Asenath Waite, from the Innsmouth Waites. Twenty-three years old, studies Mediaeval Metaphysics at the university. Apprehension fills me, not merely because it seems inappropriate that my friend, who has already reached thirty-eight, will court a girl so young; but because I am aware of the rumors regarding the town of Innsmouth, and if half of those are true… Well, let’s just say that I would prefer to just not know.

Edward perceives my worry, and while he does not seem to fully comprehend the reason for it, he – bless his tender soul – embraces me and allows me to bury my head in his chest. The sole proximity of his warm, beloved body manages to relax me, and I tell myself that I must be brave for my friend, I must protect him – and I will.

I start the inquiries the next day, and while my findings seem, prima facie, like a reason to triple my worries, what I actually feel is a certain relief, for now I know what am I fighting against. The girl, they say, is the daughter of a wizard, and rumored to practice witchcraft herself. While fairly beautiful, she is said to have an uncanny gaze; overprotuberant eyes who seem to never blink, and add to her odd reputation. Animals avoid her, as well as many of her old school mates, who claim that she is a genuine practician of hypnosis, and used to perform many strange experiments back during her school days. To the list of strange behaviors and traits, we should finally add some weird talk about desiring to had been born a man.

It is beyond all reasonable doubt: the woman is a witch. I am sure that as my Edward hears this, he will understand the depth of his mistake, and call off the romance.

Everything will go back to the way it used to be.

Everything will be all right.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is taken from one of my favorite XKCD comics:  
> <https://xkcd.com/513/>


End file.
